Thursday, April 17, 2008

sometimes...

Sometimes it feels like nothing goes well. This week has been that way for me. You name it, it went wrong. Every day something wasn't right. Every day something could have been done differently. I thought today was going to be better, but as the day went on I felt more and more stressed and then culminated with a phone conversation with the new home where my old foster child is placed. It just ended poorly.

Work's crazy. Things are changing. Big time. I'm up for it, but it will be a challenge. However, on the bright side of things I got lucky enough to be assigned a cool little tablet laptop for work! That was a good thing (the sunshine for me today.)

Little one misses me. Each time we talk she wants to know when she gets to move back with me and why can't I just adopt her. That kills me. It crushes my spirit. It's so hard to hear. She's counting down the days until we get to see each other. I miss her. I miss her a lot. It's tough. I never even thought it would hit me THIS hard.
Hopefully, with time, things will get better. But, I'm still pretty tearful and tonight was one of those nights I just really missed having her around.

So, the BEST part of my week is this



I made a huge decision and bought a new camera. I can't wait to get it out and experiment with it this weekend. It should be a fun time and I'm looking forward to it a lot. Like I said, this week's been crazy. I've been doing stuff each night and taking it easy...but Saturday is the day I'm starting to play around with it. And, Sunday, I'm going to try to shoot some pictures for a friend and her family at Woodward Park. I hope I get at least 1 good family picture for them....they haven't had one since their youngest was born (4 years ago!)

Anyhow, I'm doing alright...I'll be okay, but I'm just on the bummed side of life right now. Please tell me this road of chaos will get better soon.

2 comments:

Unknown said...

I hope your week has gotten better! I can't imagine how much you miss Violet. I think being a foster parent would be extremely hard. I would want to keep every child that came through my home that is why I am not a foster parent!:) I think it is great that you get to keep in contact with her. The camera is awesome and good with your photo shoot this weekend. I can't wait to see the proofs.

Anonymous said...

I truly understand the gray days of life. I have definitely felt my fair share in the last year... I wish I had the magic words to make things all better. But I DO know that things will brighten at some point. You are such a wonderful, positive person - I know that you will start finding some rainbows here and there.

And SUPER COOL on the new camera!!! Fun fun fun. Can't wait to see the results!

Smile for me Emily - I love yoU!
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